[ Bastien is quiet for a few seconds, scratching lightly behind By’s ear and feeling helpless. He imagines he could love him like this for his whole life and still not come close to satisfying the hungry shadow his family left behind in him. Then he thinks that’s alright, really. He can love the shadow too. And he slides his head closer, knocking his forehead into Byerly’s, a little less than gently but not hard enough to hurt. ]

They should be the ones dreaming of making you proud. Every night. They should be haunted by it.

[ It’s trite, and there’s a little playfulness in the hyperbole, but it’s wrapped around sincerity. ]

But I know it’s easier to say than to feel.